not for all to read

'Kau tau apsal aku tak dipilih jadi mushrif?

kalau la mase aku jadi mushrif tu kitorang kena tangkap basah,
mesti nyesal pnye pompuan tu, sebab kena kawin ngan aku..
aku dah la tak ensem…'
>
aku suka kat sorang budak cun ni,
tapi kalau la budak tu tu tau aku suka dia,
mesti dia bunuh diri pnye..

> >

>
inferiority complex

> >

>
I think most of us have already known what does it mean by these two words. I was one of the sufferers. By the way, the dialogue above was not from me, but from a friend of mine. It started when I was in my fourth form in the secondary school. The real reason why, maybe it’s best for me to keep it as a secret.
> > >
My condition was so severe that I don’t even have the gut to go to the canteen, for I was afraid to see people. Well actually it was the opposite. I was afraid that people would SEE me. I’d rather use the recess time to go someplace where there’s no one around.

> ? >

Being a social phobic for almost 2 years is not a pleasant experience for me to live through. I had difficult times mixing with people, cooperating especially with the opposite genders and presenting works in the class. Usually I prepare the stuffs and my friends present them in front.

> > >

Me as a kid was pretty naughty and stubborn. Going out early in the morning and came back home just few minutes before Maghrib. So the next time we moved out, my parents on purposely ( I think) chose a location far away from populations.

> > >

My house was surrounded by nothing but trees and lizards and swamp - no inhabitants in radius around 50 meters. It was only a few years after that when people started to build their houses and live not far from ours.
> > >
The ‘extracurricular activity’ that I usually did during the holidays before we moved out stop and I spent most of my time in the house in front of the tv. Not mixing with people retards the growth of my communication skills.
> > >
I would try to find as many excuses when my mother asked me to buy groceries. I was afraid to meet people and try my best to avoid them. I’d rather pick a route less travelled by than the one congested with cars and people.

> > >

Actually its normal for some teens to have this problem, and it will cease as they grow up. But if they cant shake it off as they get older, that’s when treatments are needed. I have a friend, who has this complex.

> >

>

Though not as complicated as mine, but it needs to be treated somehow. Changing people’s way of thinking is not as easy as typing this entry. He can work together normally with us but not with the females. Excessive shyness limits their involvement in many events. Eventually, these social phobics (not my friend) will develop double personality. And some even hate the girls. Or males.

> >

>
My social phobia and inferiority complex disappeared little by little, but I never completely healed.

>

>